how can I even
try?
jesus do you even
get my demons?
this is a big city
and I can't be
waiting
for you to appear
at every corner.
this anxiety will
eat me away
and I can't deal with
it.
I should be happy
right now.
I should leave you
(and thoughts of you)
alone.
maybe in that way
you won't come back.
what if what I feel
reached you every
night?