I saw a picture of you and laughed

I wanted to write
about the adventures we never had.
sometimes I think you are
the perfect example of both
and obsession.
your sister talks to me
and it hurts.
not because I miss you
but because of
who I was.
I wanted to write
about us.
guess us will never be.
I don't miss anything
because that me is
I wonder what
happened to the
you I fell for.
he's probably dead,
crushed by long nights,
sex, drugs, alcohol
and parties you won't remember.
like me, maybe.
who knows if you were troubled?
I think I saw a spark some time ago.
the one that made me fall so deeply.
I don't love you but
my last wish would be
to get to know
you, at least.