speed dial 2

i miss you so much oh my god. like how the hell does anyone stand this. this silence. i mean please. can ANYONE actually be like this? do you think that this doesn't hurt? who the fuck are you? i can't believe i keep on missing you. i miss your silence, i miss your voice. i miss almost everything and every single aspect about spending the night with you. i can't sleep at night sometimes because i keep on remembering the relief of your lips. am i insane? probably. i don't know. i don't know anymore. someone told me that if you didn't want to talk i should try calling you but every time i decide to call you you're asleep or away or god knows where. you live lost in a forest when in reality you're living in the middle of a buzzing city and that's exactly how i am. i'm the busy streets. you know that. i'm the smoke in your lungs and i love that. then you look out the window and see nothing but grey walls and i wish i could be there to see those walls but you standing there being cold and shivering from the rain. i wish. oh god how i crave you. how i wish you weren't a ghost. some of your friends said you were like a dead man walking. and i love you nonetheless. you're skin and bones but you're my skin and bones. where are you? can you please answer the phone? i love you. please. i love you.