how does death feel to those
who've never had time to come terms
with their own mortality?
is it sweeter?
do they think it's god's work?
is somebody coming to get them, can they see them?
do they know a secret we ignore,
like a recipe,
or they just accept it when it comes?
funny feeling
i so desperately struggle to keep my mind at ease
that i forget about the joy of misunderstanding.
taking for granted what is not mine, and
what i can't take with me,
as if there's an answer within this realm
that would make me understand.
uncomfortable spaces between the locked thoughts,
where the look out the window
is a grim, dark reality,
enlightened only by rays of sunlight
of occasionally well-intended people
who live outside of me.
i thought i always knew the answer,
then i decided i didn't anymore and tried to find it again.
within my papers, in my head,
around me, in the people i love.
maybe the answer has been lost for a reason,
and i might need to stay with that funny feeling
for a little longer,
until it figures me out,
or the other way around.
that i forget about the joy of misunderstanding.
taking for granted what is not mine, and
what i can't take with me,
as if there's an answer within this realm
that would make me understand.
uncomfortable spaces between the locked thoughts,
where the look out the window
is a grim, dark reality,
enlightened only by rays of sunlight
of occasionally well-intended people
who live outside of me.
i thought i always knew the answer,
then i decided i didn't anymore and tried to find it again.
within my papers, in my head,
around me, in the people i love.
maybe the answer has been lost for a reason,
and i might need to stay with that funny feeling
for a little longer,
until it figures me out,
or the other way around.