may 1st

i elevated my honesty
to a place where i can't return
i've been in arms for longer than normal
a goodbye turned into a precious time
into a
i'll go round the world with you
travel by deserts and pouring rains
for you
in a sweetness that
neither of us is ashamed of,
but still concerned.
what will happen when the other fades?
will i ever remain steady,
looking through the eyes that know me
and feel like i've actually reached
the place i wanted to be?

the always

always seems to be
a good relapsing measure
to take control of how much
i need to stop.
how many times a week my stomach feels full of trash and sadness
how many times me eyes flutter with fear
how often i cry when i can't control what surrounds me
how long it takes for us to wake up
it's a forever that's definite;
buried in my blood like good old
sinking stones
and i have images of sinking but
they're nothing like what i've seen before