auto-boycott

I try to be strong you know
and you just love to put up the fight
it gets tiring to wake up in the morning
and have nothing to get up for

I try, I try so fucking hard
to bear in mind
that I'm doing all of this
to keep you out of my heart

I try, but your waves are so strong
you crash me, crash me,
every day,
and almost every night.

and you know you could've
just said 'no'
and it'd been alright for me
but oh how you like to claim your prizes

am I?
am I your victory?
did you manage to rule me over?
or is this a tide?

I will always wonder
until the day you realize
you always run from your problems
and you'll make up your mind

I guess that's why I became a diver

how can people stay in shallow waters
when the deepest
darkest
part of the ocean
holds the richest
most intriguing
parts?

how can you be contempt with
a minor fraction
shared with everyone
a tiptoe
into what the universe
and the world
actually are?

yes
you can get lost in the depths
but you can also
find yourself